YES! and AMEN!
A friend writes about a girl she’s mentoring: “I feel like I’ve just hit a huge wall with her when it comes to her growth as a person and lack of follow-through on the advice or challenges I give her. Anytime she encounters a problem, she runs right back to have me help her.
Good stuff Seth!
“If your disciple is to ever change, you are going to have to put a demand on them” sounds like the school of thought that pushed me away from the church.
We are urged in scripture to consider both the “goodness and severity of God. Rohr reminds us that we need both conditional and unconditional love. We must be honest and direct. We would do it with our kids, we must do it with those we disciple…
Before I proceed, I would like to say that this blog has never failed to give me a fresh thought on Christian Living every time I read it! Thank you Seth for the ideas you post here!
I am not a religious leader neither I am into converting somebody into Christianity, what I find here is for my self and how I could be a good Christian.For this alone I am so grateful.
I agree that in order to love somebody we should know them first,otherwise our love will be blind!
I also agree that in order to have a reciprocal love with our fellow men,both will have to demand something from each other, and those demands must be based on common belief that if one breaks it,their love will be in peril..this is tough, but this makes us think hard and careful on our actions towards each other, we place ourselves on a higher level among the creatures that God created.
When it comes to our relationship with God as we know Him, we leave Him to do his will for us.
I agree. I’m a strong Christian but believe it’s up to the person to change not for them to do what I tell them. And I don’t tell people that “hey, you’re not listening. It’s time for us to stop hanging out”. That’s not biblical. Jesus loved Judas and it’s OBVIOUS that he didn’t pay attention to what Jesus was saying. So more importantly, Jesus loves us even when we don’t listen to Him. It’s not up to a person giving advice for them to dictate when you’re a lost cause. If you still have issues with the church….just know that Christians are highly flawed just like everyone. So seek Jesus over anything and everything and know that Christians give horrible advice sometimes. Take all council to God. He is the last word.
My first time to this site….I was looking for more info on discipleship.
First thing, I don’t ever see an example of breaking off discipleship in the bible. Jesus NEVER told people that since they weren’t listening to His words that it was time for them to part ways.
What I do see is this….a natural dissolve of the relationship when the follower becomes uninterested in the disciplers words.
So my suggestion is this, don’t tell the discipled that it’s time to get serious or we’re done. That means your love is conditional. Instead, find out why they are apparently “doing their own thing” then ask if they find that spending time with you is even beneficial for them. To think that we as people are ALWAYS a blessing to others with our opinions and suggestions is ignorant & arrogant. Maybe we aren’t even helping them but discouraging them. It’s a good opportunity to self evaluate to meet their needs….NOT just give them biblical advice because it’s supposed to help them. Every person & situation is different and must be handled differently.
AND….if they enjoy your time spent together but don’t listen to the stuff you say. Then just use that as an opportunity to “hang out” with them and love them in the process. We discount just basic hang out time as wasted time because we’re not pounding Jesus in their heads. Jesus spent time with people. That’s how they knew He loved them. To me, that’s a pretty good example of how to handle things.
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