Well said… I’m going to share this with all my unmarried nieces, nephews and friends…
Experts are divided. “I don’t really think opposites do attract,” says
William Ickes, PhD, professor of psychology at the University of Texas at
Arlington and author of Empathic Accuracy. Jean Lawrence in this article on WebMD cited some significant ways people can be alike or
Physical attractiveness. “I think we seek a certain level of
attractiveness similar to our own,” Ickes says. “The Beast looks for
Beauty, not the other way around.” If unattractive people pursue attractive
people, they are not as likely to be successful.
Money. If you have zero dollars, you may aspire “to hook up with
a mate who’s loaded,” Ickes says, “but what is the chance this person
is interested in you?”
Desire for children. If the desire for a family is a source of
contention, similarity of desire might be better, Ickes says.
Religion. “I know some successful mixed marriages,” Ickes
says. “If you respect and tolerate the differences and don’t use the kids
as pawns, you can choose your own [spiritual] path.”
Class. “How often do you see an aristocrat marry a commoner in
real life?” Ickes asks. “That’s so rare you only see it in the
Education. “Educated people do not tend to marry stupid
people,” Ickes says. “But uneducated people can be smart. You need to
be able to talk, interact, and share world views.”
Great points Seth. Most important is that you both love the Lord . In many ways David and I are totally opposite, he’s neat , Im messy! He plans everything , I fly by the seat of my pants ! At the end of the day though these differences have enriched our marriage of 30 years. David reminds me often that his life would have been very boring without me !!
I agree, great points. Andy and I are complete opposites when it comes to personality, but it’s in complementary ways…ways where our opposites help each other grow into more balanced people instead of staying stuck in our ruts. But where we are the same is our values, faith and our goals in life. We both have the same destination in life in mind, and so our differences just make the road trip that much better. If we didn’t have the central core of Jesus to guide us it would be an awful relationship.
Yes, having similar values and goals are essential. Having different giftedness and perspectives strengthen the shared dream.
While most your readers know better, it’s still good to clarify what NOT to receive from Jean Lawrence: Religion: being unequally yoked spiritually. Only an unbeliever does not understand that a follower of Christ is to never be yoked with an unbeliever.
It was great to reread your romance blog, Seth. We’re watching a couple of dream-come-true before our eyes with marriages in the not-too-far future. God is a God of romance!
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