When my children reached the age of graduating high school and going out into the big, bad world, I knew that of all the graduation gifts I could give them, nothing was more important than my blessing.
We invited our closest friends over to the house and one by one, they spoke a blessing over them. When it was my turn, I had written it out like a letter.
I said things like, “I’m so proud of you. Your peers look up to you; you have set good examples for them. Whatever you do, I know you’ll succeed.” (Email me and I’ll send you a copy if you’d like.)
I could feel the emotion rising in me as something spiritual was transacted between us.
Children need their parents’ blessing in a daily sort of way, and they also need it sacramentally and publicly. It’s a way of validating their identity before others. God showed us how it’s done with Jesus: “This is my son in whom I’m well pleased.”
When finished, everyone clapped and cheered. Our children weren’t just finishing a course of study, they were becoming adults and being praised for the good choices they’d made. April and May is a season of graduation. Send out your invitations soon for not just a graduation party, but a celebration of your parental blessing of a child in whom you are well pleased.
Here are some tips on blessing your kids from Henri Nouwen:
“To bless means to say good things. We have to bless one another constantly.
Parents need to bless their children, children their parents, husbands their
wives, wives their husbands, friends their friends. In our society, so full of
curses, we must fill each place we enter with our blessings.
“We forget so
quickly that we are God’s beloved children and allow the many curses of our
world to darken our hearts. Therefore we have to be reminded of our belovedness
and remind others of theirs. Whether the blessing is given in words or with
gestures, in a solemn or an informal way, our lives need to be blessed
lives.”
A final thought: Before you bless them, you may need to go to them in private and repent for ways in which you failed them. This blog shows you as a parent how to repent to your child.
Also check out this blog on fathers saying the sacred “Yes”
Comments (130)
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Seth Barnes
I'm motivated to join God in his global reclamation project. He's on the move, setting his sons and daughters free from their places of captivity. And he's partnering with those of us who have been freed to go and free others.
Please email a copy of your graduction letter. I too like others are struggling with arranging my thoughts together in a way that will properly bless my oldest graduating son (of 5 boys and 1 girl). Thanks – Sonny
My daughter is graduating in May this yr and I just can’t put my feeling into words. If you could please send me a copy of your letter n a blessing for words of my own. Thank You and God Bless You
Please email me a copy of your letter. I was widowed when my son was 10; he is now 23 and graduating with his Master Degree and I want my letter to convey how very proud I am of him. I have a ‘feeling’ God sent me to your website.
Please send me a copy of your blessing
Please send me a copy of your letter blessing your son.
my son is also graduating from high school.
thanks you so much.
When we parents pause and consider how our words will stay in the hearts and minds of our children all their lives, we do well to choose our words wisely.
My non-Christian parents, never thought of this when they said things like, “You are the cause of all my problems”, “My daughter is dead”, “I wish you had never been born”. Such hurtful words made more painful in that they remain in my mind and wound my heart.
As parents we can choose to bless or curse our children. Choose blessings! The words we say to them, will be with them long after Christ calls us home. Make sure the words you plant in your child’s heart and mind are ones you want to be planted – words of love, encouragement, support, belief and faith. Say things like, “I want you to know that whenever Christ calls me home, I am ready to go. I will be in heaven and I will be looking for you. Make sure you are there!”, “I believe in you”, “You are my favorite son in all the world”, “God has a plan and a place for you”, “God will make a way for you”, “I know what you are facing is difficult and you would rather stay home and hide. I also know you are stong enough to go out there and face the world. You can do it”, “Jesus is with you”.
Our blessings must be given at special ocassions and they are nourishment to the soul of our child daily as they grow. Bless them today, tomorrow and the day after that! If in doubt, bless them more. Lavish your love and blessing on your sons and daughters. It is this lavish love exemplified in blessing that enables our youth to become the adults God can use in mighty ways. Our love and blessings give roots to our children as we help them find their wings, and as we watch them fly!
As I write this my 18 year old son, Mark, is in India on a 3 month-long mission trip during his senior year of high school. He thinks he is ordinary. He does not know how extraordinary he really is. God made a way for him! And I firmly believe that God will work in and through him during this mission trip. God will be glorified.
Gail, great additional thoughts there. Thank you.
Please send me a copy of your graduation letter to your children. I am trying to put my thoughts together for my son’s graduation. Thanks and my Bless your work in the Lord.
Please e-mail me a copy of your graduation letter to your children, as I am having a hard time putting my words together.
God Bless you
Please email your graduation letter. My son is graduating and your words would be a help.
Thank you!
Please email your graduation letter. My son is graduating and your words would be a help.
Thank you!
Please email me your letter, too, as my son is graduating tomorrow, and I’m also having a hard time with words.
please send me a copy of the letter you wrote my daughter is a 2007 grad and im having a hard time putting it in words thanks darlene
I am haveing trouble putting into words. Hopefully with a little bit of a different point of view I can finish my letter.
Thank you
I would love a copy of your letter…I, like the others, just a need a little help.Thanks.
I would love a copy of your letter.
I would like a copy of your letter as well, please…
thank you in advance
email me your graduation letter. Thankz!
FYI to interested parents – I’ve emailed everyone who has written me and have sent them a copy of blessing i gave my children.
Please send me a copy of your letter. I too am having a difficult time trying to put words together during this emotion event.
thank you. Maria
Please send me a copy of your letter.
If my heart could speak, I would be fine.
Please forward me a copy of your letter as well. Thanks!
My son is on a mission trip between his junior and senior years of high school. We are very proud of him, but do not express it enough to him. We’ve sent him daily letters to let him know how much we love him, and how proud we are. I’d appreciate receiving your letter to read. Thank you.
Please e-mail your graduation letter. My son is graduating soon and I would like to put a few things in writing and I need inspiration. Thanks
Please send me a copy of your graduation letter. My son will be graduating soon and I would love some help.
I would greatly appreciate receiving a copy of your letter. Thank you for sharing.
I, too, am writing a letter to my son as he will graduate from high school in June. I would greatly appreciate it if you could send me a copy of your letter as well as the blessing.
Thanks so much for sharing!
I am trying to write a graduation message to my son for his senior yearbook. Please e-mail me a copy of your letter. It may be what I need to help me put my thoughts together. Thank you
Me Too….please send me a copy of your graduation letter I’m at a loss for words.
thanks
Please send me a copy of your graduation letter.
Blessings,
Suzanne
Please e-mail me a copy of your letter. It is my turn to write one for my sweet daughter.
Thanks You
I would very much like to hear what you wrote for your daughter. I have one myself soon to graduate and she will be going far from home for college. I want her very much to stay connected. Thank You
Please send me a copy of your letter. Thank you.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Please send me a copy of your letter.
all the best,
Mike
Touched by your thoughts… I also would like a copy of your letter, My daughter will be graduating soon. So many thoughts are running through my mind, so much I wanna say to her, she is such a blessing to all who know her.
thank you for your help,
cloudy with emotions
My son will be graduating from OU in a few weeks, I would love to read your blessing, this would help me during his graduation party with all our friends and family. I want him to know how proud I am of him and let him start out in the right direction.
Blessings
Dave
I would love to have a copy of the letter also. Thank you
My husband and I were just talking about this, would you please email a copy of the letter. I would so appreciate it. Thank You So Much! ~Pattie
Please send me a copy of the letter. Thanks.
I would love a copy of your letter to your son upon his graduation from High School…..Thanks
I would love a copy of your letter, if you don’t mind sharing. I am an emotional wreck my son will be graduationg in may 2009 and I am tring to prepare myself and get ready for his big day. I would also love any advice you may have.
Thank you so much
Please email me a copy of your letter so I can put it in my daugher year book for graduation. thankyou
please email a copy of your blessing letter
Please email me a letter to your son on graduation.
Could you please email me a copy of youe blessing letter
Thank you
Please e-mail me a copy of your blessing letter
Thank You
I would love a copy of your Blessings letter. Thank You
I would enjoy reading a copy of your Blessing.
Would you please email a copy of the letter. I would so appreciate it. Thank You So Much! ELaine
Would you please send me a copy of your letter. My son is graduating high school on 6-23 and I really want to be able to write a letter to him to guide him.
thanks.
Roger
I would love a copy of your blessing letter. Thank you.
please email me the graduation letter to your son.
Kindly send me a copy of your letter. My daughter will be 23years old ond 2nd DECEMBER, 2009. I want to bless her on that day. Your letter will assist me to find the right words to use. God bless you.
I would love a copy of your blessing letter to your son. My daughter will be graduating in June 2010. Thank you and God Bless You!
Thank you for your site. My husband and I would like to receive a copy of your blessing letter.
I would love to receive a copy of your blessing letter. Thank you.
I would love a copy of your blessing letter you wrote for your son. Thank you.
I would love a copy of your letter, thanks
please email me the graduation letter to your son
You are a blessing – I would love a copy of your letter to your son. Thank you and God Bless, Ell
I enjoyed your article. I would love to have a copy of your letter to your son. This will be a great help to me as I prep for graduation. Blessings, Tom
Please send copy of your letter.
Please send me a copy of your letter. =)
I was directed back to the page where I found you! I was hoping to view a copy of the letter you wrote “I’m so proud of you” “Your peers looks up to you” Maybe I’m missing it? Thanks for your time.
I, too, would like a copy of your letter. Our oldest is graduating next month and the school has a senior blessing event with all seniors and their parents. I would appreciate seeing what someone else writes.
Please send me a copy of your letter:)
My son is graduating from college and planning on doing missionary work in the States. Please send me a copy of your letter.
I need help putting my feelings and thoughts into words for my son’s high school graduation letter. Please email me yours as a guide. Thank you.
Can anyone reading these comments help me locate the graduation letter? I keep getting redirected back to the main page and I cannot find “the letter”. Thanks.
Cari and all others – for each of the people entering a comment above, I have for the past four years been emailing a copy of my letter. In fact, Estie just graduated from nursing school yesterday and we got a chance to bless her again. It’s a wonderful thing to do.
please email a copy of your graduation letter I have only one son who will graduate this June and he has struggled along this difficult road I have a hard time putting my thoughts into words and would love to read your letter thanks norina
I would very much like to get a copy of your graduation letter. T use as part of my own letter to my daughter, who is graduating this month.
God Bless,
Norm
Thank you for this post. It is inspirational to a lot of people, as you can see. I would love to see a copy of your graduation blessing. Could you email me a copy? Thanks again.
Please email me a copy of your graduation letter to your children. I would love to read your inspirational words as I am also getting ready for my daughters graduation.
Thank you
Please email me a copy of your letter. I want to do something very special for my son who is graduating. Thanks so much!
Please email me a copy of your letter. You have encouraged me to do this for my son who is graduating. Thanks.
Hello,
My Son is graduating Middle School and they would like for us to say a blessing for our boy. We really don’t know where to start cause he is such a wonderful boy. Could you send me a copy of your letter? This would be much appreciated to help out my husband and myself.
Thank you so much
would you send me a copy of your letter ?
I really have the same mind as posted by Jamie Wood.No75
Thank you very much.
Seth,
By the volume of letters, it is very clear that we long for that blessing and to extend it to our kids. I’m so glad that it is never too late for a blessing and that there are people -perhaps not parents-who will bless us with intention.
Thank you for being a blessing and in your compassion -urging us to act and not wallow.
Al
Please email me a copy of your letter. Thanks!!
May I respectfully ask that you send me a copy of your letter and blessing to your graduate. I must say that your words and feelings must have made a profound impact on not only your child but many people for over 3 years now. My only child graduates soon and I honestly don’t know how I’ll be able to hold it together when I share my heart with her. I could use some divine inspiration! I hope your offer still stands. God bless you and many thanks!
Please email me your inspirational words. Thanks
Would you please send me a copy of your letter & blessing – Thank you so much!
I am so touched by the numbers of parents that are longing to bless their children and asking for help to do that. I too would like a copy of your letter. Thank you!
Blessings to you and your loved ones,
Debbie
Please email me a copy of your letter & blessing. Thanks. I’m going to try and write one of my own for my grandson. Thanks.
Dee – please send me your email and I’ll be happy to send you a copy.
Please e-mail me a copy of your blessing to your son. I am writing one of my own for my son who is graduating this year. Thank you.
Seth, I’d love to see a copy of the letter you wrote. How cool it is to see that this many years after writing that letter, that it’s still be used in other people’s lives even now! Thanks. 🙂
Please send me a copy of your letter & blessing. Thanks so much.
I like so many others would appreciate a copy of your “blessing” letter. Thank you!
Please send a copy of your blessing letter. Thanks!
Please email me a copy of your blessing letter. I need to compose a letter for my graduating son and I am at a point where I need to put together some thoughts. Would love to see your ideas. Thanks
Please HELP.
I have to daughters going into middle school next year and i would like to write a letter to them about how proud i am of them. How can i write a letter to them about expressing my thhoughts and feeling about there growth.
Thanks,
Teri
Please send me a copy of your blessing letter!! Thanks so much!
Heidi
Thank you for offering to share your letter. I’d love for you to send me a copy, please. Many blessings to you & your family~
Please send me a copy as well.
Much thanks and God bless your family.
please send me a copy of your letter,my daughter is graduating in June 2011
Would love to have a copy of your letter…and thank you ahead of time for sharing it with me and all the other parents!
Please email copy of letter and thank you in advance.
Would you be so kind and send me a copy of your letter also.
Please email me a copy of your letter and thank you.
please do send me a copy. Thank you for sharing.
Could I please have a copy of the letter too? Thank you so much!
Please send a copy of your letter. Thank you
Please send me a copy of your letter – my daughter is graduating from highschool and I am having trouble focusing my thoughts. Thanks!
I would love a copy of your blessing letter. I am writing one for my son and would love some insight. Thanks
I would love a copy of your blessing letter. I am writing one for my son and would love some insight. Thanks
Would appreciate a copy of your blessing letter…our son is graduating in May 2013 Thanks!
If you are still sending out your blessing letter, I would appreciate a copy for some insight. My oldest will be graduating and would like to give him something he can cherish as he starts his own life. Thank you.
Hi! I am writing a blessing for a special weekend in which my friend and I will call out our sons from childhood into manhood. This “calling out weekend” has been in the planning for 6 Months. It will signify an important change in their lives. I would like a copy of your blessing to help me develope mine. Gods blessings to your ministry! Rich
Hi, pls send me a copy of your letter. I am blessing my child on Sunday and working to finalize my own. Would love to see your blessing. Thank you.
I would appreciate if you would send me a copy of your blessing letter. Our daughter graduates soon, see an idea of we could incorporate this into her graduation celebration. Thanks
My Daughte is going to High School next year.
i want to give her a blessing to accompany her on her journey.
Can you please help with an example of such?
please send me a copy of your lovely blessing to your son. thank you
Can you please send me a copy of your blessing letter. I am trying to write one for my daughter who is graduating in June going to Christian college in the fall 2015.
Please e-mail me a copy of your graduation letter to your children, as I am having a hard time putting my words together.
God Bless you
please send me a copy of your graduation blessing to your son. thank you
Your words are inspirational. By the number of post on your site, you have touched so many people. If you are still emailing a copy of your blessing, I would surely appreciate it. I would like to bless my children not only for graduations but for all the milestones in their lives. Thank you in advance for sharing!
Please send me a copy of your letter. I would greatly appreciate it!
My son graduates this Sunday from High School. Please send me a copy of your blessing letter. I would greatly appreciate it!
My son graduates this Sunday from High School. Please send me a copy of your blessing letter. I would greatly appreciate it!
I enjoyed the article that was written and the words were so touching. My daughter’s son is graduating from college and she needs to write a few powerful words for his yearbook, they must be brief, but outstanding. Would you please e-mail me a copy of your graduation letter? It would be so helpful to someone who hasn’t the talent for words.
I would love a copy of the graduation/blessing letter to your son. I have four sons and three daughters ranging in age between 26 and 15 years. Not only am I trying to compose a letter to my youngest son who is 17 and finishing high school this year but I am writting a letter to all my children so they know how special they are and how much I love them. I am finding this hard as I’m not sure how to express myself clearly and effectively to each. As my children have different needs and nature and I want each one to feel special.I would be very greatful for any ideas. Thank you. Carolyn
Please send me a copy of the letter. I an having an extremely hard time put my thoughts into words.
Thank you for sharing your letter! I would love to have a copy.
Our daughter is graduating this year. Blessings!
Please send me a coy of your blessing letter. Thank you!
Please send me a copy of your letter.
Please send me a copy of your blessing letter. God bless you!!
I would love to have a copy of your blessing letter, if the offer still stands. God Bless!
Please forward a copy of your letter of blessing. I would like to take notes! Thank you….