I’m not going senile

It’s 11:30 at night. Karen just made her last appearance in the kitchen before bed. “We’re getting old,” she declared before heading off to bed. I hardly need any reminding. I had been thinking of the time when the office staff laughed uproariously when I was t…

By Seth Barnes

28 January 2011, 12:01 am

By Seth Barnes

28 January 2011, 12:01 am

It’s 11:30 at night. Karen just made her last appearance in the kitchen before bed. “We’re getting old,” she declared before heading off to bed.

I hardly need any reminding. I had been thinking of the time when the office staff laughed uproariously when I was told to pick up the phone and talk to my daughter Emily. Two lights were blinking on the phone and I thought she was on line one. I picked up the receiver. “Hi babe!” I said cheerily into the phone.

“Excuse me?” Came the confused response. Not Emily. The word “flabbergasted” doesn’t do justice to what I felt as I groped for words.

“Oh, you’re not Emily! Well, never mind. You never heard me, and I wasn’t here!” I exclaimed, putting her on hold.

Somehow, the whole office had been listening in on my conversation. They exploded into gales of laughter.

The poor lady on the other end got lost in the shuffle and hung up. It was an hour before she called back. When I came back from lunch, there were four messages waiting for me on the machine from staff with disguised voices having a jolly time at my expense.

I figure that it’s better to tell such stories on oneself than to suffer the knowing smirks of people as one walks past. Anyway, it helps me illustrate the point that we’re growing old.

Another case in point: I just spent five minutes looking for a magazine that I wanted to read tonight. “Where did I put that thing?!” I thought. Turns out I had set it on the bed and Karen had set it on the floor – OK, I’m not going senile. But still, there was some doubt there. I’ve spent far too much time looking for stuff that I had no business forgetting about. Yesterday, for example, I was leaving for the car in the morning. I had wanted to take a banana for lunch. I had a bunch of stuff in my arms. “Where did I put that banana?” I asked with exasperation.

“It’s in your hand,” Karen replied.

No, I’m not having a crisis. But I do live my life in the shadow of 1 Peter 1:24, “All men are like grass, and their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of the Lord stands forever.”

Comments (11)

Joshua & Jessica Davis (Jessica Orr)

January 28, 2011 at 12:27 am

Love it.
Grant McGuire

January 28, 2011 at 2:03 am

crackin up!
Uche

January 28, 2011 at 2:28 am

This is very funny. Sola and I are rolling…
Joy

January 28, 2011 at 7:25 am

So true, the worst for me is, you are walking out the door making sure you have everything you need, car keys, purse jacket etc, where is my phone I think to myself, looking around the house, all the while I am talking on it!
karen shoda

January 28, 2011 at 7:54 am

I relate Bro. ! LOL
talia

January 28, 2011 at 8:47 am

i want to be just like you pops! you and mom keep life fun. love you.
Gregg Pawlowski

January 28, 2011 at 9:19 am

Thanks for being so transparent…I resemble that guy! LOL!
Tim Abare

January 28, 2011 at 10:30 am

I laughed big time, called my wife into my home office and read it to her and she laughed too. Then we soberly looked at each other and realized that our laughter was indicative of the idea that we’re right there with you.
Jeff Goins

January 28, 2011 at 11:25 am

Love it! Hilarious.
Kathy Pride

January 29, 2011 at 5:19 pm

Are you living my life? This is a daily happening in our household…I can’t believe how much time gets wasted looking for things, so my solution is to purge, purge, purge. Of course, I probably purged the camera box my husband, who is also in the same state of getting old as I am, is looking for this very moment that I am typing.

And not to mention forgetting other things. But then again we are also caring for my aging mom who forgets most things on a moment to moment basis and lends perspective to it all.

At least this week I remembered to buy bobby pins for my daughter’s hair so there was no pre dawn pre cheerleading hair crisis this morning.

Ah, life, you gotta love it!
Noe

January 30, 2011 at 5:20 am

I say I’m old all the time too!

2 TIMES, YEP, 2 TIMES on this race, this month, I’ve asked out loud “Where’s my phone? Man, I can’t believe I lost it!”

30 seconds later I reply out loud to myself in total embarrassment, “Oh wow, I’m talking on the phone”

the room ERUPTS in laughter as I’m on a call to a team leader.

Happy 29th birthday noe, lol.