Kingdom reality on a Thai beach

I feel a stirring deep inside my heart. It’s this insatiable longing for MORE, more than life as I previously knew it. As A.W. Tozer says, “Thirsty hearts are those that have been wakened by the touch of God within them.” My heart has been awakened to KINGDOM. Jesus came preaching, “The Kingdom of God is near…” My heart has been awakened to this crazy, absurd, upside down Kingdom where you lose your life to save it, humble yourself to be exalted, and give up everything to gain everything (just to name a few). The craziest part is that this upside down Kingdom is the only thing that makes sense to me.

The reality is that we live in the midst of a great battle. There is an enemy and he comes only to kill, steal, and destroy. He is destroying life, dehumanizing people with intense brutality, and holding peoples’ lives in dark, dank dungeons. There are people being held captive all over the world. From gang members in Mexico and Nicaragua held captive by their addictions, to beggars in Asia held captive by their poverty, AIDS orphans in Cambodia held captive by their disease, prostitutes in Thailand held captive by their desperation, the men visiting these prostitutes held captive by cravings that can’t be satisfied, business men held captive by an insatiable desire for wealth. There are many captives; I have seen them, talked to them, and befriended them. The darkness of this world is overwhelming, but there is LIGHT piercing the darkness.

For there is also LIFE, abundant life. Life that brings unconditional love, unexplainable grace, and unimaginable freedom. This life is a free gift from our Savior, our Lover, our God. Jesus is a God who loves us with unspeakable passion, gave His life for us, and delights in us. The God who created me, who created the universe, also delights in me. The world needs to know this! Captives can be set free with this love.

It doesn’t make sense to sit comfortably at home with the knowledge of this immense love. There are people dying all around me who need the life that this Kingdom brings.

I finally understand Jesus’s parable in Matthew 13:45-46: The Kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it. This always seemed a bit imprudent to me; selling everything you have for one pearl. Now my heart has been awakened and my eyes have seen that this Kingdom, this pearl, truly is worth all that I have and all that I am.

This awakening begins with praying dangerous prayers: Lord break my heart for what breaks Yours! And it brings forth from within me a passionate shout: Everything I am for Your Kingdom come!