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The balance between intimacy and urgency

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Intimacy cannot be done quickly. It requires that we take the wristwatch off. Glance at the clock when you’re trying to connect and you put a lid on what happens next. You can’t expect someone, whether a friend or God himself, to open his spirit to you when you’ve prioritized other…
By Seth Barnes




watch1Intimacy cannot be done quickly. It requires that we take
the wristwatch off. Glance at the clock when you’re trying to connect and you
put a lid on what happens next. You can’t expect someone, whether a friend or
God himself, to open his spirit to you when you’ve prioritized other things
above him.

Intimacy and urgency can coexist, but rarely in proximity to
one another. To find intimacy with another, you must slow time down, at least enough
to communicate, “You’re valuable to me; I value you enough to go at your pace,
not mine. Take all the time you need.”

Urgency – the tapping foot, the drumming of fingers – says, “This
task has a time frame attached to it and needs to get done. Relationships
are secondary.”

Jesus perpetually balanced intimacy with the Father with the
urgency of meeting human needs. In one scene, after healing many people the night before, Jesus spent the early morning hours in solitude. By the time the needy mass of
people found him, his sense of urgency had returned. “I must preach the good
news of the kingdom of God to the other towns also,” he declared. (Luke
4:42-44)

We Americans struggle mightily with this issue. Our work week
has lengthened to 50+ hours while our debt has risen to unsupportable
levels. We feel urgency all the time while our souls whither for lack of
intimacy. We find ourselves losing the ability to calibrate. And our neediness gives us the
hard edges that drive people away, sending us into an exile from one another
and from ourselves (insofar as we better understand ourselves as we find
intimacy). 
 
Ultimately, you’ll not be fulfilled
if all you feel is urgency. Productivity is not enough. We need to connect with one another and God. We are social beings, connection and intimacy add color to our gray
lives.
 
I once prayed with a man who felt estranged from God. When at last God spoke to him, he wept. “What did God say?” I asked.
 
He replied, “God said, ‘I missed you.'”
 
Listen to the hunger inside you; it’s the still, small voice
of God calling you deeper. Some of you have been away too long. We need you in
our lives.

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