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What makes me cry

Few things make me more uncomfortable than crying in front of other people. In private, especially in the dark, I’m OK. But I find it embarrassing in public. Our girls don’t have this problem – they are unfettered in their weeping. I believe it is a cultural thing for guys like me. There is a …
By Seth Barnes

Few things make me more uncomfortable than crying in front of other people. In private, especially in the dark, I’m OK. But I find it embarrassing in public. Our girls don’t have this problem – they are unfettered in their weeping. I believe it is a cultural thing for guys like me. There is a lie that we’ve believed: “Big boys don’t cry.”

I was thinking about this after watching “Nanny McPhee,” a children’s movie, and yes, children’s movies with happy endings where the separated lovers get married make me cry. Don’t ask me why; I’m not by nature sentimental. I can even come across as cold to some people. My nature is to be rational.

Two other things that start me weeping are when the Holy Spirit is moving in a prayer (unless you’ve felt this, you may just figure I’m weird or maudlin), and when I’m being asked to make room for hope in my youngest daughter’s life. When you’ve seen so little hope, it’s amazing how emotionally tender you can be when it tries to show up.

For some reason, being vulnerable about this isn’t difficult in a blog, though having you in the same room while I’m weeping would be a real struggle. In the last half of my life, I’m trying to learn what it means to be more fully human. I want to laugh more easily and cry unashamedly. Many of you men need even more help than me in this regard. It’s a sensitive little issue for a lot of us guys.

I’d like to hear what others think about this.

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