April 19, 2006 | Seth Barnes | Spiritual Coaching | 4 Comments | Views 0

Where do I find a spiritual coach?

By Seth Barnes

19 April 2006, 12:04 am

A spiritual coach is more than a mentor, they are in your life to help you grow spiritually (a mentor who helps you grow in any of a number of ways). So, where do you find such a coach? I suggest that you begin relationally. Finding someone to connect with is a lot harder here in America than, say in Europe, where they work hard at hanging out. You have to figure out “Can I trust this person?” In other words, “If they give me advice that I’m not sure I agree with, will I give them the benefit of the doubt?”

Answering this question can take some time. What do you see in the person’s life that you want to learn from and have in your own life? You need to see stuff worth emulating. Most pastors may be great at dispensing advice, for example, but don’t have a clue about actually discipling people as Jesus did.

Understanding that there is no instant formula for finding a spiritual coach and that your best bet is to find someone who has produced the kind of fruit you want to produce gives you some people to talk to and pray about. Here are a few things you might try:

Where do I find a spiritual coach?

Don’t use the word “discipler” – that implies commitment in a commitment-skittish culture.
Make a list of all the people whose walk with God you admire, who you think might possibly get what it means to be a spiritual coach.
Pray about who to ask.
Ask them to coffee.
Tell them that you’re looking for a spiritual coach. Ask, “Would you meet w/ me once a week for a month and advise me and hold me accountable?”
After you meet for a month, assess together. What did you each learn about the process?
Pray in advance about meeting longer. Share what God said.
If this sounds daunting, email me and I’ll help you get started.

Comments (4)

Bill Wilkie

April 19, 2006 at 6:25 pm

Reply

Seth,
I really appreciate the substance of your blog; however, I think you are really way off on how to help a newbie find a spiritual coach.

It about a common passion with the potential coach. The process should include the following elements:

1. Define your own spiritual passion.
2. Identify your talents using friends and family.
3. Identify your spiritual gifts.
4. Combine these and brainstorm several alternative projects that God might want you to work on for the next 3-4 years.
5. Using advisors, pick one project that could involve a team.
6. Write a one or two page summary of the project including goals, implementation strategy, benchmarks, etc.
7. Identify in your world, 5 people who share your spiritual passion.
8. Research each of them and rank order the list 1 to 5.
9. Select the top one and make an appointment. Give them your summary ahead of time and if the meeting goes well, ask them to coach you one hour a month around their passion/expertise and your project.
10. It will be very difficult for them to say no.

http://www.next-generation-series.com
seth

November 4, 2006 at 11:01 pm

Reply

Bill, this describes the mentoring process, as distinct from the process of coaching someone to grow spiritually.
OFONMBUK M. E

July 10, 2007 at 8:01 am

Reply

I will be very happy if you can link me with a good spiritual coach of your choice.
Spiritual Coach

March 30, 2012 at 3:56 am

Reply

Spirituality, spiritual development and well being will mean different things to different people. Hardly people would get into the depth or know about these terms in details. Unless there is a professional spiritual coach to teach and guide, people would barely take interest in learning the facts and its effects on human mind.