Where do I find a spiritual coach?

A spiritual coach is more than a mentor, they are in your life to help you grow spiritually (a mentor who helps you grow in any of a number of ways). So, where do you find such a coach? I suggest that you begin relationally. Finding someone to connect with is a lot harder here in America than, say in Europe, where they work hard at hanging out. You have to figure out “Can I trust this person?” In other words, “If they give me advice that I’m not sure I agree with, will I give them the benefit of the doubt?”

Answering this question can take some time. What do you see in the person’s life that you want to learn from and have in your own life? You need to see stuff worth emulating. Most pastors may be great at dispensing advice, for example, but don’t have a clue about actually discipling people as Jesus did.

Understanding that there is no instant formula for finding a spiritual coach and that your best bet is to find someone who has produced the kind of fruit you want to produce gives you some people to talk to and pray about. Here are a few things you might try:

Where do I find a spiritual coach?

1. Don’t use the word “discipler” – that implies commitment in a commitment-skittish culture.
2. Make a list of all the people whose walk with God you admire, who you think might possibly get what it means to be a spiritual coach.
3. Pray about who to ask.
4. Ask them to coffee.
5. Tell them that you’re looking for a spiritual coach. Ask, “Would you meet w/ me once a week for a month and advise me and hold me accountable?”
6. After you meet for a month, assess together. What did you each learn about the process?
7. Pray in advance about meeting longer. Share what God said.
8. If this sounds daunting, email me and I’ll help you get started.