Stop Victim-Thinking! Betrayal Is God’s Backdoor to Promotion

In my first job out of college, a mentor I trusted turned on me. I remember him trying to make me feel better by saying, “I don’t hate you, Seth.”

I didn’t respond, but inside I thought, “Well, that’s reassuring!” I felt shocked, betrayed—and for a year, I saw myself as a victim.

This pattern repeated twice more. Each time I clung to the narrative that my bosses didn’t appreciate my skills. I was a victim. My confusion lingered for years.

I didn’t understand what God was doing until one day while mowing my lawn, I felt Him speak to me: “You know that season when you were fired and felt worthless? That wasn’t your mentor doing that to you. That was Me promoting you. Your internship had ended. I had to pry your hands off the wheel to show you a new path.”

I felt the Lord asking, “Would you want to still be there?”

“No.”

“You were there to be prepared for your next assignment,” he showed me.

What a revelation! Tears came as I realized: I hadn’t failed—God had been forming me. I wasn’t a victim. I was being prepared.

I had always believed the verse, “All things work together for good for those who love God,” but often only in theory. When I had cried out to God for rescue, and nothing changed, I couldn’t see how the pain was part of his plan.

But seeing my story through his eyes changed everything. My old boss wasn’t a persecutor—he was a tool in God’s hands. That painful exit became a doorway into one of the best seasons of my life.

Betrayal is one of life’s most disorienting experiences. It shatters expectations and leaves us reeling. Whether it’s a friend who walks away, a spouse who leaves, or a leader who fails you—the wound cuts deep. We ask, “Why would God allow this?”

But what if the betrayal wasn’t an end? What if it was a doorway?

We often miss the shift because we’re still rehearsing the pain. We label ourselves victims—wounded, discarded, sidelined. But sometimes the pain itself is a sign: you’ve learned what you needed to learn. You’re not being cast aside—you’re being called up, and is God is quietly saying, “You’re ready.” Ready to lead with humility. Ready to speak with the weight that suffering brings. Ready for the next level—not in your strength, but in the strength forged in fire.

Scripture shows us this pattern. Joseph is betrayed by his brothers—only to be elevated to save many. David is hunted by Saul—but formed into a king in the wilderness. Even Jesus is betrayed by Judas, setting in motion the redemption of the world.

We think betrayal means we’ve failed, or God has abandoned us. But often, it’s the opposite: we’re on the verge of something new.

How do we avoid mistaking God’s promotion for betrayal?

First, listen beneath the pain. Ask God, “What are you removing so something new can grow?”

Second, resist the urge to fix or vindicate yourself. Sometimes God’s strategy is silence, allowing him to work in secret.

Third, stay open to his redirection. What feels like a door slamming may be the Spirit steering you toward an unexpected assignment.

So if you’re in a season of betrayal, take heart. You may not be losing—you may be being led.

Trust the Shepherd, even when He leads you through shadows.