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Courage requires vulnerability

Questions to Ask in 2021
I liked Brene Brown’s TED speech. Here are some things she said that I found provocative. Her studies validate the kind of love that Jesus practiced. Shame is really easily understood as a fear of disconnection.  [People wonder], is there something about me, that if other people know or see,…
By Seth Barnes
By Seth Barnes
I liked Brene Brown’s TED speech. Here are some things she said that I found provocative. Her studies validate the kind of love that Jesus practiced.
Shame is really easily understood as a fear of disconnection.  [People wonder], is there something about me, that if other people know or see, that I won’t be worthy of connection?

If I took the people I interviewed and divided them into people who really have a sense of worthiness (those who have a strong sense of love and belonging) and those who struggle for it, folks who are always wondering if they’re good enough.  There was only one variable that separated [these people].  And that was the people who have a strong sense of love and belonging believe they’re worthy of love and belonging.  That’s it.

The one thing that keeps us out of connection is our fear that we’re not worthy of connection.

What [these people also] had in common was a sense of “courage.”  “cour” means heart.  And the originally definition of the word was to tell your story with your whole heart.  These people had the courage to be a person.  They had compassion, (and we can’t have compassion to other people if we can’t treat ourselves well).  They had connection.  This was a hard part, and came as a result of authenticity.  They were willing to let go of who they thought they should be in order to be who they were.  Which you absolutely have to do that for connection.

They [also] fully embraced vulnerability.  They believed that what made them vulnerable made them beautiful.  They didn’t talk about vulnerability being comfortable.  Neither did they talk about it being excruciating…. They just talked about it being necessary. They talked about being willing to say, “I love you,” first. The willingness to do something where there were no guarantees.  The willingness to invest in a relationship that may or may not work out. They saw [vulnerability] as fundamental.”

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